Hello my lovely, inspirational ladies. I know I don't SAY much, but I have been keeping up on all your happenings. It has been a zoo here! I've been on two holidays since I posted last, Las Vegas and Florida. Work is in year-end chaos, and I've had to major investigations on the go... no fun, no fun. Anyways, I thought I'd post some pictures from Flordia... and Harry Potter Land! They made the castle... it was intense. Anyways! Pictures!... are not included in this post because my P.O.S computer is broken. But next time, fo-shizzle.
Also, I had my first fill yesterday. It was a... interesting experience. The fill clinic is two hours away from house, so I got to make that enjoyable drive in a blinding snow storm. They are predicting -36 celius with the wind chill here tomorrow, so winter has come on hard and fast. Anyway, I got to the clinic which was smack in downtown Edmonton. I get inside, and there are two fill nurses, a trainee and the actual nurse. Guess which one had to poke 8 times before she hit the port? She had me believing the port was flipped for a long, nasty moment. Anyway, they added 1CC, which puts me at 7.5 CC. I feel a little more restriction today, but I'm told its too early to really know if its made a difference. They give fills every 4 weeks, so I hope this one made some difference. It would cuh-ray-zee to actually lose weight over the holiday.
I guess I should confess I'm a scale coward... I only want to step on the scale when I've been sort of well behaved for a week straight. The fill nurse made me weigh myself... something I haven't done since before Vegas. So, I weighed in at 179.5 lbs... down from 188.5 lbs on my surgery date Sept, 17th. I'll take that! I know some of that was my fluids recovery, but I've been on real food for 5 weeks now and no weight gain. Heck, I even lost on my Florida trip, which is fairly amazing considering how many lbs of crab legs I ate. Not quite my bodyweight, but close.
Happy Thanksgiving Season to (did I miss it already?) to all my American friends... I hope someone is thankful for that fact that it's not so f***ing cold down there. I know I was... 26 degrees, with a gentle ocean breeze sounds glorious right now. See you guys!
Friday, November 18, 2011
Sunday, October 16, 2011
Solid Food, Zombie Apocalypse and... AM I SKINNY YET?
Hi Everyone!
So... I think I'm going to be one of those bloggers, who fall off the face of earth for long periods and then return and writes loooong epic posts.
So, It's been almost a month since my surgery already (cuh-ray-zee!) and I am feeling pretty well back to my old self. I have lost 17lbs and now weigh 182.5 lbs (this morning) that's up a little from where I was but I expected to gain some weight back with solid foods and Canadian Thanksgiving in there. I've lost about 5 lbs since surgery which is pretty unremarkable but better than a kick in the pants. I'm afraid I'll gain it all back before I can have a fill.. I haven't been as well behaved food wise as I should be. Maybe it's like the feast after the famine and it will go away soon. By the way, I made stuffing for the first time ever on Thanksgiving and it was AWESOME. So proud of myself. I am extremely not... domestic, or talented in the kitchen, so this was sort of a big deal.
I didn't post anything during full fluids and purees.... mostly because there was nothing to post about. Other than apple sauce and soup. Both of which I will probably never eat again. And then, suddenly, BAM solid food. It was almost like I wasn't ready for it. I was working out of town all last week... so I started solid foods on Tuesday without the ability to really measure my meals. Anyway, nothing disasterous happened. I was a little uncomfortable the first two days. I sorta felt like something was stuck in my throat. But, no PBing or sliming or anything dramatic like that.
I'm eligible for a fill in just a few days. And I'm pretty sure I need one because I can definitely eat more than 1 cup of food. It's strange, when I overeat the shoulder pain return with a vengeance! I had to take painkillers the night of Thanksgiving because I made a piglet out of myself.
This whole process has forced me to take a long, hard, HONEST look at my eating habits, and they're way worse than I thought they were. A couple years back I used Her*bal Mag*ic to lose about 70lbs. Before I did that program I had no idea what it meant to eat well. I didn't know what was in food. Odd right? But I seriously had no idea about calories and fat content. So, HM educated me a little and since leaving that program I've always sort of kept an eye on my food intake and kept my weight under control.
So what happened that caused me to gain 40 lbs in all of 6 months? Well... there's a couple things, but a big one I think is that I moved in with my boyfriend of 2 years, TFG. A couple things happened immediately following that:
1) Food intake increased. And, all of a sudden, I wasn't preparing my own meals anymore. We are eating to TFG's preference, which includes alot of carbs and fried foods. Temptation is everywhere.
2) Activity level decreased. I don't know exactly why this is... I've never been a hang out and watch TV kinda girl, but all of a sudden I find my butt planted on the couch more than I care to admit. And I have no energy to fix it. I've been back to the gym a couple times in the last few weeks and I am feeling better because of that. But still... I'm not active like I was when I lived in my old place.
Now, I'm not blaming TFG or the house or anything else for my circumstances, but I DO noticed a direct correlation between all those changes and all this weight gain.
Also, because I've been able to eat solid foods for two weeks, and I have managed to eat pretty much anything I want with no consequences, I've noticed that I am eating a TON of carbs (which are the HM devil). I don't like potatoes... so I hardly eat them. But bread, rice, egg noodles... bring em on.
So this week, I want to get a fresh start. We are leaving for Vegas on Oct 27th and I want to have lost another 2 lbs before then. Also, I want to get a fill before we go. Hopefully I won't have too much trouble scheduling that. I live about 2 hours from the closest fill point so it will be tough to schedule and will mean taking a day off of work. I've been thinking about asking my GP to get the training... but that's a big step considering he doesn't even know I had the surgery. This is the man who delivered me by the way, so I feel a tiny bit guilty I must admit.
I'm so excited for Vegas and a get away. Things have been pretty tense around here and I think both TFG and I really need to get away for a little while. When I get home from Vegas weekend I turn around and pretty well fly directly to Florida for a week with my family in DisneyWorld... ahem... HARRY POTTER LAND! *end nerd attack*. So, that's pretty exciting too.
Usually, when we talk about vacations one of my big fears is food and weight gain. Especially because, being 23 years old, alcohol is still a big part of what it means to be on vacation. I'm less stressed now that I have the band. I can already feel myself eating less than I used to, which is a great starting point. Hopefully with a fill I will be well on my way to weighing 150 lbs again.
Uhm... closing note, Jello shots are the devil (the regular one, not the HM one). And the 47 I drank last night are making me feel a teeny bit rough today. So instead of doing all the productive stuff I was going to do, I have dedicated the day to online Christmas shopping.
Oh! And Zombie Apocalypse! Holy jeeze, I read One Slim Cat's post and my mouth fell open and I just sort of stared for 7 minutes before fits of laughter set in. Not because I find Z.A amusing, quite the opposite, this is a real and serious concern... but because I had just invested an hour of my hung over life in watching the History Channel special about the origin of Zombies and how the Z.A could actually take place, and what to do to survive said Z.A... anyway, it just seemed fitting. And it made me giggle.
Have a great week everyone! I hope all you BOOBs had a great time in Chicago... I thoroughly enjoyed reading about it. Thanks to everyone who has been so supportive and great in this community. You guys are awesome and without you I likely never would have gone through with the surgery.
Cheers!
So... I think I'm going to be one of those bloggers, who fall off the face of earth for long periods and then return and writes loooong epic posts.
So, It's been almost a month since my surgery already (cuh-ray-zee!) and I am feeling pretty well back to my old self. I have lost 17lbs and now weigh 182.5 lbs (this morning) that's up a little from where I was but I expected to gain some weight back with solid foods and Canadian Thanksgiving in there. I've lost about 5 lbs since surgery which is pretty unremarkable but better than a kick in the pants. I'm afraid I'll gain it all back before I can have a fill.. I haven't been as well behaved food wise as I should be. Maybe it's like the feast after the famine and it will go away soon. By the way, I made stuffing for the first time ever on Thanksgiving and it was AWESOME. So proud of myself. I am extremely not... domestic, or talented in the kitchen, so this was sort of a big deal.
I didn't post anything during full fluids and purees.... mostly because there was nothing to post about. Other than apple sauce and soup. Both of which I will probably never eat again. And then, suddenly, BAM solid food. It was almost like I wasn't ready for it. I was working out of town all last week... so I started solid foods on Tuesday without the ability to really measure my meals. Anyway, nothing disasterous happened. I was a little uncomfortable the first two days. I sorta felt like something was stuck in my throat. But, no PBing or sliming or anything dramatic like that.
I'm eligible for a fill in just a few days. And I'm pretty sure I need one because I can definitely eat more than 1 cup of food. It's strange, when I overeat the shoulder pain return with a vengeance! I had to take painkillers the night of Thanksgiving because I made a piglet out of myself.
This whole process has forced me to take a long, hard, HONEST look at my eating habits, and they're way worse than I thought they were. A couple years back I used Her*bal Mag*ic to lose about 70lbs. Before I did that program I had no idea what it meant to eat well. I didn't know what was in food. Odd right? But I seriously had no idea about calories and fat content. So, HM educated me a little and since leaving that program I've always sort of kept an eye on my food intake and kept my weight under control.
So what happened that caused me to gain 40 lbs in all of 6 months? Well... there's a couple things, but a big one I think is that I moved in with my boyfriend of 2 years, TFG. A couple things happened immediately following that:
1) Food intake increased. And, all of a sudden, I wasn't preparing my own meals anymore. We are eating to TFG's preference, which includes alot of carbs and fried foods. Temptation is everywhere.
2) Activity level decreased. I don't know exactly why this is... I've never been a hang out and watch TV kinda girl, but all of a sudden I find my butt planted on the couch more than I care to admit. And I have no energy to fix it. I've been back to the gym a couple times in the last few weeks and I am feeling better because of that. But still... I'm not active like I was when I lived in my old place.
Now, I'm not blaming TFG or the house or anything else for my circumstances, but I DO noticed a direct correlation between all those changes and all this weight gain.
Also, because I've been able to eat solid foods for two weeks, and I have managed to eat pretty much anything I want with no consequences, I've noticed that I am eating a TON of carbs (which are the HM devil). I don't like potatoes... so I hardly eat them. But bread, rice, egg noodles... bring em on.
So this week, I want to get a fresh start. We are leaving for Vegas on Oct 27th and I want to have lost another 2 lbs before then. Also, I want to get a fill before we go. Hopefully I won't have too much trouble scheduling that. I live about 2 hours from the closest fill point so it will be tough to schedule and will mean taking a day off of work. I've been thinking about asking my GP to get the training... but that's a big step considering he doesn't even know I had the surgery. This is the man who delivered me by the way, so I feel a tiny bit guilty I must admit.
I'm so excited for Vegas and a get away. Things have been pretty tense around here and I think both TFG and I really need to get away for a little while. When I get home from Vegas weekend I turn around and pretty well fly directly to Florida for a week with my family in DisneyWorld... ahem... HARRY POTTER LAND! *end nerd attack*. So, that's pretty exciting too.
Usually, when we talk about vacations one of my big fears is food and weight gain. Especially because, being 23 years old, alcohol is still a big part of what it means to be on vacation. I'm less stressed now that I have the band. I can already feel myself eating less than I used to, which is a great starting point. Hopefully with a fill I will be well on my way to weighing 150 lbs again.
Uhm... closing note, Jello shots are the devil (the regular one, not the HM one). And the 47 I drank last night are making me feel a teeny bit rough today. So instead of doing all the productive stuff I was going to do, I have dedicated the day to online Christmas shopping.
Oh! And Zombie Apocalypse! Holy jeeze, I read One Slim Cat's post and my mouth fell open and I just sort of stared for 7 minutes before fits of laughter set in. Not because I find Z.A amusing, quite the opposite, this is a real and serious concern... but because I had just invested an hour of my hung over life in watching the History Channel special about the origin of Zombies and how the Z.A could actually take place, and what to do to survive said Z.A... anyway, it just seemed fitting. And it made me giggle.
Have a great week everyone! I hope all you BOOBs had a great time in Chicago... I thoroughly enjoyed reading about it. Thanks to everyone who has been so supportive and great in this community. You guys are awesome and without you I likely never would have gone through with the surgery.
Cheers!
Tuesday, September 20, 2011
Help... Weird symptom
Hey guys,
This is day four since my lap band was placed and I've developed some kind of weird symptoms. I am burping pretty much continiously, especially after drinking. Also I have some lower abdominal pain going on... Kind like there's a fist behind my belly button. I won't even tell you about gas passing... Yuck. Is this all normal guys? Any advice would be helful... I'm kinda worried and the clinic hasn't been much help. Thank!
This is day four since my lap band was placed and I've developed some kind of weird symptoms. I am burping pretty much continiously, especially after drinking. Also I have some lower abdominal pain going on... Kind like there's a fist behind my belly button. I won't even tell you about gas passing... Yuck. Is this all normal guys? Any advice would be helful... I'm kinda worried and the clinic hasn't been much help. Thank!
Sunday, September 18, 2011
Surgery Day, Clear Liquids and the Yellow Brick Road to Recovery
Morning everyone!
So, I've officially been banded. It's day 2 of my 5 day clear liquids phase. I don't feel bad at all. A bit of gas pain in my shoulder, and my port incision hurts a little... but other than that, not much pain at all. In fact, this is already a thousand times better than my damn wisdom teeth last month.
We flew into Toronto on Thursday evening, and got into the hotel about midnight. Our flight was delayed so I didn't get to visit the CN Tower and have my last 'pre-band' meal up there. Likely for the best though, because I was so tired by the time we got into the hotel I didn't have much trouble getting to sleep.
The next morning I get into the Clinic at 8:30, as scheduled. I met with Counsellor lady, who took my picture and answered any other questions I had. To be honest, I didn't really have any. I have been reading about this procedure obsessively for almost a year, plus all the great advice from you wonderful ladies... I felt pretty confident going into surgery. It was almost 11 when they asked me to come into the Operating Room. I had been fairly panic free until this point, but I walked into this room and there's all these sharp objected and this surgery bed that looked like something from the movie Hostel... straps for arms and nasty bent stirrup thingies. At this point I'm pretty scared. The nurses and doctors were wonderful tho and the next thing I knew I was waking up in recovery.
They kept in the Clinic for a few hours and then we (my Mom and I) went back to the hotel room for a nice long afternoon nap. That evening we went for pedicures at the hotel's gorgeous spa. Saturday our flight didn't leave until 3:30 PM, so we had some time to wander around downtown Toronto. What wonderful shopping! Mom and I agreed we would have to come back when we had time to stay and explore. I did find a HOT pair of redneck sex appeal boots, which came home with me. (Thanks, mom!) Anyone who's read this blog from the beginning now knows that my Mama spoils me rotten. That put my total new shoe count for the banding trip up to 3 pairs:
The flight home was probably the worst part of the whole experience. My band felt really tight and it was uncomfortable to be stuck in that little seat for so long. I watched the movie Hanna, which was totally bizarre.
This morning I woke up feeling really good, still a bit of gas but nothing horrible. The Gas-X seems to be helping. The Clinic gave me Dem*erol, but I don't like to take narcotics, so I've just been layering liquid Tyleno*l and Advi*l. Seems to be working fine. Back to work tomorrow, the first day of another week long Audit. Yikes! It should be fine though... if I continue to feel this good I'm not worried about going back to work. Also, I'm not hungry at all, which seems weird considering I haven't eaten in three days. But, hopefully that's a good sign.
Have a great week everyone and thanks for all your encouragement!
So, I've officially been banded. It's day 2 of my 5 day clear liquids phase. I don't feel bad at all. A bit of gas pain in my shoulder, and my port incision hurts a little... but other than that, not much pain at all. In fact, this is already a thousand times better than my damn wisdom teeth last month.
We flew into Toronto on Thursday evening, and got into the hotel about midnight. Our flight was delayed so I didn't get to visit the CN Tower and have my last 'pre-band' meal up there. Likely for the best though, because I was so tired by the time we got into the hotel I didn't have much trouble getting to sleep.
The next morning I get into the Clinic at 8:30, as scheduled. I met with Counsellor lady, who took my picture and answered any other questions I had. To be honest, I didn't really have any. I have been reading about this procedure obsessively for almost a year, plus all the great advice from you wonderful ladies... I felt pretty confident going into surgery. It was almost 11 when they asked me to come into the Operating Room. I had been fairly panic free until this point, but I walked into this room and there's all these sharp objected and this surgery bed that looked like something from the movie Hostel... straps for arms and nasty bent stirrup thingies. At this point I'm pretty scared. The nurses and doctors were wonderful tho and the next thing I knew I was waking up in recovery.
They kept in the Clinic for a few hours and then we (my Mom and I) went back to the hotel room for a nice long afternoon nap. That evening we went for pedicures at the hotel's gorgeous spa. Saturday our flight didn't leave until 3:30 PM, so we had some time to wander around downtown Toronto. What wonderful shopping! Mom and I agreed we would have to come back when we had time to stay and explore. I did find a HOT pair of redneck sex appeal boots, which came home with me. (Thanks, mom!) Anyone who's read this blog from the beginning now knows that my Mama spoils me rotten. That put my total new shoe count for the banding trip up to 3 pairs:
The flight home was probably the worst part of the whole experience. My band felt really tight and it was uncomfortable to be stuck in that little seat for so long. I watched the movie Hanna, which was totally bizarre.
This morning I woke up feeling really good, still a bit of gas but nothing horrible. The Gas-X seems to be helping. The Clinic gave me Dem*erol, but I don't like to take narcotics, so I've just been layering liquid Tyleno*l and Advi*l. Seems to be working fine. Back to work tomorrow, the first day of another week long Audit. Yikes! It should be fine though... if I continue to feel this good I'm not worried about going back to work. Also, I'm not hungry at all, which seems weird considering I haven't eaten in three days. But, hopefully that's a good sign.
Have a great week everyone and thanks for all your encouragement!
Friday, September 16, 2011
Today is the day!
Yep... THE day. We flew into Toronto last night and I am on my way out the door to the clinic. Wish me luck!
Saturday, September 10, 2011
Pre-Op Detox and the Count Down is ON!
Happy Saturday Everyone!
These last couple days have been much better... so no more super-b*tchy blog posts for me, one was enough. TFG is doing great, and thanks everyone for the well wishing. His wires will come off October 3rd... right about the time I'm doing my last day of mushies. Coincidence? Well, probably, but at least we can suffer through liquids together.
The pre-op detox was tough for the first few days, likely because I was coming down off a 7 year caffeine high. But, I gotta say, I usually drink no less than 3 Diet Pepsi in a day, and for the last week NONE, nada, no cheaty-cheaty. And I feel good! Actually, I feel great, I've got more energy than usual and I'm having a way easier time getting up in the AM... no 45 minutes snooze alarm.
I found these meal replacement bars called Nutribar and they are the bee's knees (yes, I know, but my sister is only little and I had to banish "cat's ass" from my vocabulary because it perplexed her). These bars have 220 Cal, 35%-45% of most of your daily nutrients and they actually taste delicious. They also claim to keep you full for 5 hours, and seem to actually deliver. Anyways, these little buggers saved me from a life of cottage cheese and egg whites so I'm eternally grateful.
So far I haven't gone into a cottage cheese induced rage at work, which is good. We recently did the Myers-Briggs personality test and I discovered I am an 'ENTJ'. Which, pretty much means I shouldn't try to nuture anyone ever. Poor TFG, no wonder I was such a lousy nurse maid. It's actually kinda interesting, and it gives you a good starting point for understanding people you findfriggin impossible... trying. One day I'll tell you the story about why I never EVER do on-line personality tests (Stooopid Eharmony).... but not today!
The time to take pre-op measurements and photos is fast approaching. *GULP* I'm not normally internet-photo shy (see the Pictures from the Crazy Times tab) but for some reason this is causing me a little anxiety. Is it the prospect of putting bikini clad photos on the internet... a little. But mostly, I don't want all of the nice people in blog land to discover...I have no belly buton. There, I said it. And it's horrible. So, nobody laugh when I post the pictures, or at least if you do laugh don't tell me because I'll be traumatized.
So far I've lost 7 lbs on the pre-op detox. I'm hoping to sneak back into 180's before we fly to Toronto on Thursday. In my next post I'm going to do goals/rewards and measurements/pictures... so stay tuned for that hot-mess.
Have a great weekend everyone! XOXO
These last couple days have been much better... so no more super-b*tchy blog posts for me, one was enough. TFG is doing great, and thanks everyone for the well wishing. His wires will come off October 3rd... right about the time I'm doing my last day of mushies. Coincidence? Well, probably, but at least we can suffer through liquids together.
The pre-op detox was tough for the first few days, likely because I was coming down off a 7 year caffeine high. But, I gotta say, I usually drink no less than 3 Diet Pepsi in a day, and for the last week NONE, nada, no cheaty-cheaty. And I feel good! Actually, I feel great, I've got more energy than usual and I'm having a way easier time getting up in the AM... no 45 minutes snooze alarm.
I found these meal replacement bars called Nutribar and they are the bee's knees (yes, I know, but my sister is only little and I had to banish "cat's ass" from my vocabulary because it perplexed her). These bars have 220 Cal, 35%-45% of most of your daily nutrients and they actually taste delicious. They also claim to keep you full for 5 hours, and seem to actually deliver. Anyways, these little buggers saved me from a life of cottage cheese and egg whites so I'm eternally grateful.
So far I haven't gone into a cottage cheese induced rage at work, which is good. We recently did the Myers-Briggs personality test and I discovered I am an 'ENTJ'. Which, pretty much means I shouldn't try to nuture anyone ever. Poor TFG, no wonder I was such a lousy nurse maid. It's actually kinda interesting, and it gives you a good starting point for understanding people you find
The time to take pre-op measurements and photos is fast approaching. *GULP* I'm not normally internet-photo shy (see the Pictures from the Crazy Times tab) but for some reason this is causing me a little anxiety. Is it the prospect of putting bikini clad photos on the internet... a little. But mostly, I don't want all of the nice people in blog land to discover...I have no belly buton. There, I said it. And it's horrible. So, nobody laugh when I post the pictures, or at least if you do laugh don't tell me because I'll be traumatized.
So far I've lost 7 lbs on the pre-op detox. I'm hoping to sneak back into 180's before we fly to Toronto on Thursday. In my next post I'm going to do goals/rewards and measurements/pictures... so stay tuned for that hot-mess.
Have a great weekend everyone! XOXO
Friday, September 2, 2011
Shenanigins, Tomfoolery and... complete and total B*llshit
I'm determined not to become an absentee blogger!
Sorry I fell off the face of the world there... I was on holidays in B.C, and then I came back to a bit of a disaster.
I have a high stress job... yeah, I know everyone says that, but I really do. I'm responsible for investigating and determining root cause of personnel and process related safety incidents for a large oil and gas company. It's the kind of job middle aged, highly educated men get. I'm a 23 year old female with a technical school diploma. So anyway, the pressure is always on, and I desperately needed an escape. So I took 10 days holidays and took off to B.C. I floated around on a houseboat in the Shuswaps and drank in excess for 4 days... it was great. There we costumes and fake boobs... very much like floating Vegas. Then I came home.
The plan was to spend the next 5 days riding my ATV out in the west country... not quite the mountains, but working on getting there. I just bought a new quad this year... her name is Bella and she's a beauty. She replaced Beaskly, who was not a beauty, but was very rugged. TFG came out to join us Thursday after work and we all went for one last tear before tucking into the vodka for the night.
TFG was in an accident when we were almost back to the road. His quad rolled unexpectedly and landed on him. It was single handedly the most horrible thing I've ever seen and I'm pretty sure I'll always see it as slow motion milli second by milli second action when I think of it. He was injured pretty badly, his jaw was broken in 2 places and he was bleeding from a pretty nasty gash on his head. Once we rescued him from the bush (that's a story for another day) he spent 3 days waiting for surgery in the local hospital... gotta love Alberta Healthcare.
Anyway, he's home now and doing much better. I returned to work in the middle of a Corporate Audit, which made the last 3 days suck too. I started my pre-op detox today. It's 2 weeks long and pretty much all you can eat is egg whites and cottage cheese... it's gonna be a rough 2 weeks. TFG is also on an involuntary jaw-wired-shut diet, so we will be on liquids together as of Sept 16th.
I'm not as scared as I thought I would be to have surgery. Mostly, I'm afraid that this desperate, last ditch attempt to get healthy and escape the diet rollar coaster will fail too. I'm terrified that there is no solution and I will be fat and unhappy forever, except now I'll be fat and unhappy with a foriegn object installed in me. Pleasant thoughts, eh? I'm not normally such a downer but I think the last week has gotten the better of me. Between the broke jaw, the in-laws, and the corporate audit I want to stick my head in a tub of Ben and Jerry's and never surface again. Invisible Ice Cream Ostrich Power.
Anyways, have a great long weekend everyone! Hopefully this detox won't cause me to committ a homicide or anything like that, and the next time we chat I'll be a bandster! Oh, and to all you ladies headed off to Chicago have a BLAST! It looks like a great time :)
Sorry I fell off the face of the world there... I was on holidays in B.C, and then I came back to a bit of a disaster.
I have a high stress job... yeah, I know everyone says that, but I really do. I'm responsible for investigating and determining root cause of personnel and process related safety incidents for a large oil and gas company. It's the kind of job middle aged, highly educated men get. I'm a 23 year old female with a technical school diploma. So anyway, the pressure is always on, and I desperately needed an escape. So I took 10 days holidays and took off to B.C. I floated around on a houseboat in the Shuswaps and drank in excess for 4 days... it was great. There we costumes and fake boobs... very much like floating Vegas. Then I came home.
The plan was to spend the next 5 days riding my ATV out in the west country... not quite the mountains, but working on getting there. I just bought a new quad this year... her name is Bella and she's a beauty. She replaced Beaskly, who was not a beauty, but was very rugged. TFG came out to join us Thursday after work and we all went for one last tear before tucking into the vodka for the night.
TFG was in an accident when we were almost back to the road. His quad rolled unexpectedly and landed on him. It was single handedly the most horrible thing I've ever seen and I'm pretty sure I'll always see it as slow motion milli second by milli second action when I think of it. He was injured pretty badly, his jaw was broken in 2 places and he was bleeding from a pretty nasty gash on his head. Once we rescued him from the bush (that's a story for another day) he spent 3 days waiting for surgery in the local hospital... gotta love Alberta Healthcare.
Anyway, he's home now and doing much better. I returned to work in the middle of a Corporate Audit, which made the last 3 days suck too. I started my pre-op detox today. It's 2 weeks long and pretty much all you can eat is egg whites and cottage cheese... it's gonna be a rough 2 weeks. TFG is also on an involuntary jaw-wired-shut diet, so we will be on liquids together as of Sept 16th.
I'm not as scared as I thought I would be to have surgery. Mostly, I'm afraid that this desperate, last ditch attempt to get healthy and escape the diet rollar coaster will fail too. I'm terrified that there is no solution and I will be fat and unhappy forever, except now I'll be fat and unhappy with a foriegn object installed in me. Pleasant thoughts, eh? I'm not normally such a downer but I think the last week has gotten the better of me. Between the broke jaw, the in-laws, and the corporate audit I want to stick my head in a tub of Ben and Jerry's and never surface again. Invisible Ice Cream Ostrich Power.
Anyways, have a great long weekend everyone! Hopefully this detox won't cause me to committ a homicide or anything like that, and the next time we chat I'll be a bandster! Oh, and to all you ladies headed off to Chicago have a BLAST! It looks like a great time :)
Saturday, August 13, 2011
The Lesser of Two Evils
Bah! At some point my wisdom teeth incisions became infected and it has been an extremely CRAPPY couple of days. I was given some nasty narcotic pain killers and some heavy duty antibiotics but I'll tell ya... The effects of taking this stuff is nearly as bad as the tooth pain. Yikes! But, it feels like a colony of bees has taken residence in my teeth, so I guess pain killers it is. Boo. I hope I am better before Wed because I am leaving on a long awaited holiday.
On a much brighter note, a friend of mine has decided to join me in my lap band journey. I couldn't be happier! In truth she will probably benefit from the surgery more than me, so I'm thrilled she has decided to go ahead. It will be so nice to have someone in the real world to share the experience with.
We're headed out on our house boating adventure next week and I can't wait. I need a break from real life and the Shuswaps is a little like Vegas that way. Yay!
Have a great weekend everyone.
On a much brighter note, a friend of mine has decided to join me in my lap band journey. I couldn't be happier! In truth she will probably benefit from the surgery more than me, so I'm thrilled she has decided to go ahead. It will be so nice to have someone in the real world to share the experience with.
We're headed out on our house boating adventure next week and I can't wait. I need a break from real life and the Shuswaps is a little like Vegas that way. Yay!
Have a great weekend everyone.
Tuesday, August 9, 2011
Puffyface McSnarlypants
Morning Everybody!
Normally, I wouldn't be posting in the middle of the day since I would be chained to my desk (or steering wheel) trying to save the world from certain doom. However, today I can post because yesterday I was lucky enough to have 4 very large, rooty teeth yanked out of my head.
So today I am puffy, nauseous and bitchy all rolled together into a delightful little ball. Poor TFG.
I wouldn't normally share this picture, since it's enough to scare small children, but seriously, check out my face! It's huge, and I can't even get a spoonful of yogurt in there with out slopping it everywhere. Grrr.
On a positive note, perhaps this tooth thing will prompt some weight loss as I seem to be drifting dangerously close to that 200 lb mark again. It doesn't seem like that long ago I weighed 230 lbs... it also doesn't seem like that long ago I weighed 153 lbs. Bah... how did I gain 40 lbs in 8 months? Also, since I decided to have the band surgery I seem to be suffering from Last Supper Syndrome. Except, my surgery is still a month away. So, I'm trying to get this problem back in check by practicing the habits I will need to use with Slimband. Eating frequent small meals, eating slowly, chewing a bunch, not drinking with meals. I wish I could say I'm hitting it out of the park, but at least I'm trying. :-)
Oh and a huge shout out to JRD over at Canuck BANDit Musings for calling my blog sassy and linking it on her page. I was so excited to discover I have 5 followers this morning. Thanks you guys! I am so happy I discovered this online community and the information I've found here has been a thousand times for helpful than the Slimband page- which is just full of colorful marketing propaganda. You are all inspirational and it's been a joy to blog stalk you for the last 4 months... and now it's an even bigger joy to not blog stalk you, and be a friendly, social blogger.
Cheers everyone!
Normally, I wouldn't be posting in the middle of the day since I would be chained to my desk (or steering wheel) trying to save the world from certain doom. However, today I can post because yesterday I was lucky enough to have 4 very large, rooty teeth yanked out of my head.
So today I am puffy, nauseous and bitchy all rolled together into a delightful little ball. Poor TFG.
I wouldn't normally share this picture, since it's enough to scare small children, but seriously, check out my face! It's huge, and I can't even get a spoonful of yogurt in there with out slopping it everywhere. Grrr.
On a positive note, perhaps this tooth thing will prompt some weight loss as I seem to be drifting dangerously close to that 200 lb mark again. It doesn't seem like that long ago I weighed 230 lbs... it also doesn't seem like that long ago I weighed 153 lbs. Bah... how did I gain 40 lbs in 8 months? Also, since I decided to have the band surgery I seem to be suffering from Last Supper Syndrome. Except, my surgery is still a month away. So, I'm trying to get this problem back in check by practicing the habits I will need to use with Slimband. Eating frequent small meals, eating slowly, chewing a bunch, not drinking with meals. I wish I could say I'm hitting it out of the park, but at least I'm trying. :-)
Oh and a huge shout out to JRD over at Canuck BANDit Musings for calling my blog sassy and linking it on her page. I was so excited to discover I have 5 followers this morning. Thanks you guys! I am so happy I discovered this online community and the information I've found here has been a thousand times for helpful than the Slimband page- which is just full of colorful marketing propaganda. You are all inspirational and it's been a joy to blog stalk you for the last 4 months... and now it's an even bigger joy to not blog stalk you, and be a friendly, social blogger.
Cheers everyone!
Friday, August 5, 2011
On Motivation and a stolen survey
Everybody needs a little motivation... especially me, since I tend to forget how I don't want my thighs to look like spoiled milk anymore when faced with cheesecake.
So, since I'm a self disclosed fashion junkie, motivation often takes the form of some really B.A outfit that I am trying to squeeze into. This past Christmas, for the first time I was invited to attend a REALLY formal event for a fundraiser. These are few and far between in my little podunk town so it was pretty exciting and required shopping for a full length dress. The kind I haven't worn since gradution. There we were shopping around... and I found THE DRESS. The dress that made me say 'oh' 'ah' 'pretty' and 'I'll never eat cake again'. Tragically, said dress only comes to size 10. Alas, it was pipe dream. So I bought another dress, a nice dress... but THE DRESS.
I tell you that story to tell you this one... My mama and I (best woman ever btw) went shopping in the city the other day. And there it was, THE DRESS. In a size 10. I pointed it out and told my mama about my Gala shopping experience. Then we left and I thought nothing of it. I got home that night and I'm looking through my purchases, when my hand makes unexpected contact with satin.
My mom had bought the dress at some point when I wasn't paying attention and hid it in my other shopping. God, she's the best. I called her up and she just said 'Call it Motivation'. Love that woman.
Anyway, there was a time in my life when I wore a size 6 dress and didn't even require suck & tuck panties. I looked kinda like this...
1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?
I was named after a depressed French prostitute. No jokes, thanx Mom. Seriously, my mom named me for the song Janine, by Trooper. Which is about a girl in Montreal that's having a rough time. It's actually a really sweet love song. If you're pregnant, and you're reading this, and you're thinking about naming your kid something featured in a popular song 'Roxanne' 'Caroline' any of these things... I think you should know, we song kids hold a grudge.
2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED?
When the last time my BFF made me watch some sappy chick movie? (which I hate) Prolly last month.
3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?
Thank goodness for computers because my printing and hand writing looks like chicken scratch.
4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT?
Thai chicken.
5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS
Nope, but I am currently pregnant with septuplets! (Long story)
6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?
Well, I'd probably find myself a little grating a first. A little cocky and sarcastic... but then I would warm to me when I figured out that all that is just a cover for a warm mushy, mostly decent human being core.
7. DO YOU USE SARCASM?
My momther actually invented a word to describe my ... demenor, "Snarcastic" to be both snarky and sarcastic. Thanks mom.
8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS?
No.
9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP?
I've been twice. Once on an indor one that was like 150 ft and then once in Thailand.
10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL?
Fruitloops
11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF?
Never, step outta them and leave them exactly where they landed for TFG to trip over on his way in the door,
13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM?
Something with cookies and caramel
14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE?
How seriously they take themselves. People who take themselves real seriously make me nervous.
15. RED OR PINK?
Red.
16. WHAT IS YOUR LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF?
I am my own worst critic. I put expectations on myself that are basically unachievable and then berate myself when I don't achieve them. In fact, right now I am berating myself for berating myself too much. Go figure.
17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST?
My dad. He's not really gone, but he might as well be,
18. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO COMPLETE THIS LIST?
Yep! But I think if you steal it from me you should follow me... and be my very first follower!
19. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING?
Uhm... jeans. and Lime green shoes.
21. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW
Our Lady Peace
22. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE?
Lime green
23. FAVORITE SMELLS?
Cucumber, caramel and coffee
24. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE?
My Mom, who's in San Fran with the rest of the crew right now. Lucky duck!
25. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU?
Absolutely! I've been blog-stalking her long enough to be confident I would!
26. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH
CFL football and golf
Blonde
28. EYE COLOR?
Hazel
29. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS?
Nope
30. FAVORITE FOOD?
Crab legs and sweet potato fries
31. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS?
Scary movies with happy endings. I hate sappy girl movies, but I also hate things that end sadly.
32. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED?
Everafter
33. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING?
Green and white
34. SUMMER OR WINTER?
Summer, Western Canadian winters SUCK
35. HUGS OR KISSES?
Depends on who's delivering ;)
36. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW
"The Exiled Queen" by Cinda Willams Chima
37. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD?
It's one of those paper mouse pads with a weekly planner on it
38. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON TV LAST NIGHT?
Billy the Exterminator
39. FAVORITE SOUND(S)
A thunder storm, the sound of my sled/quad idling (smell that 2 stroke smoke!)
40. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES?
Neither.
41. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME?
Cambodia
42. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT?
I love to write fiction.
43. WHERE WERE YOU BORN?
Red Deer, Alberta
44. HOW DID YOU MEET YOUR SPOUSE/SIGNIFICANT OTHER?
A mutual friend introduced us at the bar. He grabbed my bum on the dance floor, so I bit him. That was two years ago. Go figure.
So... I guess that's it in a nutshell. Have a great weekend everyone!
27. HAIR COLOR?
So, since I'm a self disclosed fashion junkie, motivation often takes the form of some really B.A outfit that I am trying to squeeze into. This past Christmas, for the first time I was invited to attend a REALLY formal event for a fundraiser. These are few and far between in my little podunk town so it was pretty exciting and required shopping for a full length dress. The kind I haven't worn since gradution. There we were shopping around... and I found THE DRESS. The dress that made me say 'oh' 'ah' 'pretty' and 'I'll never eat cake again'. Tragically, said dress only comes to size 10. Alas, it was pipe dream. So I bought another dress, a nice dress... but THE DRESS.
I tell you that story to tell you this one... My mama and I (best woman ever btw) went shopping in the city the other day. And there it was, THE DRESS. In a size 10. I pointed it out and told my mama about my Gala shopping experience. Then we left and I thought nothing of it. I got home that night and I'm looking through my purchases, when my hand makes unexpected contact with satin.
My mom had bought the dress at some point when I wasn't paying attention and hid it in my other shopping. God, she's the best. I called her up and she just said 'Call it Motivation'. Love that woman.
Anyway, there was a time in my life when I wore a size 6 dress and didn't even require suck & tuck panties. I looked kinda like this...
But that was 7 years and 60 lbs ago.
My surgery is scheduled for September 16th, and I'm really excited, but nervous. I wish I hadn't left all this time to stew between deciding and having. Of course then I think about the bandsters that waited YEARS for their band and I think to myself, Self, suck it and stop being such a pansy. And I do. Mostly.
Also... I stole this survey from JRD at CanuckBANDitMusing who I have been following. She went through the same clinic as me so I've been spending A LOT of time lurking on her profile. I decided to day I'm guilty of blog lurking in the worst way, so now I'm making a real effort to comment and be less stalkery. Anyway, the survey:
I was named after a depressed French prostitute. No jokes, thanx Mom. Seriously, my mom named me for the song Janine, by Trooper. Which is about a girl in Montreal that's having a rough time. It's actually a really sweet love song. If you're pregnant, and you're reading this, and you're thinking about naming your kid something featured in a popular song 'Roxanne' 'Caroline' any of these things... I think you should know, we song kids hold a grudge.
2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED?
When the last time my BFF made me watch some sappy chick movie? (which I hate) Prolly last month.
3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?
Thank goodness for computers because my printing and hand writing looks like chicken scratch.
4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT?
Thai chicken.
5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS
Nope, but I am currently pregnant with septuplets! (Long story)
6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?
Well, I'd probably find myself a little grating a first. A little cocky and sarcastic... but then I would warm to me when I figured out that all that is just a cover for a warm mushy, mostly decent human being core.
7. DO YOU USE SARCASM?
My momther actually invented a word to describe my ... demenor, "Snarcastic" to be both snarky and sarcastic. Thanks mom.
8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS?
No.
9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP?
I've been twice. Once on an indor one that was like 150 ft and then once in Thailand.
10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL?
Fruitloops
11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF?
Never, step outta them and leave them exactly where they landed for TFG to trip over on his way in the door,
13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM?
Something with cookies and caramel
14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE?
How seriously they take themselves. People who take themselves real seriously make me nervous.
15. RED OR PINK?
Red.
16. WHAT IS YOUR LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF?
I am my own worst critic. I put expectations on myself that are basically unachievable and then berate myself when I don't achieve them. In fact, right now I am berating myself for berating myself too much. Go figure.
17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST?
My dad. He's not really gone, but he might as well be,
18. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO COMPLETE THIS LIST?
Yep! But I think if you steal it from me you should follow me... and be my very first follower!
19. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING?
Uhm... jeans. and Lime green shoes.
21. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW
Our Lady Peace
22. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE?
Lime green
23. FAVORITE SMELLS?
Cucumber, caramel and coffee
24. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE?
My Mom, who's in San Fran with the rest of the crew right now. Lucky duck!
25. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU?
Absolutely! I've been blog-stalking her long enough to be confident I would!
26. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH
CFL football and golf
Blonde
28. EYE COLOR?
Hazel
29. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS?
Nope
30. FAVORITE FOOD?
Crab legs and sweet potato fries
31. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS?
Scary movies with happy endings. I hate sappy girl movies, but I also hate things that end sadly.
32. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED?
Everafter
33. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING?
Green and white
34. SUMMER OR WINTER?
Summer, Western Canadian winters SUCK
35. HUGS OR KISSES?
Depends on who's delivering ;)
36. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW
"The Exiled Queen" by Cinda Willams Chima
37. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD?
It's one of those paper mouse pads with a weekly planner on it
38. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON TV LAST NIGHT?
Billy the Exterminator
39. FAVORITE SOUND(S)
A thunder storm, the sound of my sled/quad idling (smell that 2 stroke smoke!)
40. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES?
Neither.
41. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME?
Cambodia
42. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT?
I love to write fiction.
43. WHERE WERE YOU BORN?
Red Deer, Alberta
44. HOW DID YOU MEET YOUR SPOUSE/SIGNIFICANT OTHER?
A mutual friend introduced us at the bar. He grabbed my bum on the dance floor, so I bit him. That was two years ago. Go figure.
So... I guess that's it in a nutshell. Have a great weekend everyone!
27. HAIR COLOR?
Sunday, July 10, 2011
And blogger is born!
So... I have to admit, being one of those technologically inept people, I have never blogged before. But, in fairness, I've never really had a good reason too. A couple weeks ago I made the decision to have the Slimband surgery. I've got mixed feelings about this decision. It seems a little extreme, and I have to admit the people around me have been less than supportive. But! I am extremely excited. I see this as the end to my dieting days and the first step in a long journey to finally obtaining a life long healthy weight.
So, I a bit about me. I'm 23 years old and I live in central Alberta. I recently built a house and moved in with my boyfriend of two years, who will henceforth be called TFG (that friggin guy). I work in oil and gas and spend most of my time out in the field surrounded by nature. It's a great job that keeps me out of the office and gets me home every night.
I am a fashion junkie. I love to shop and I love designer clothes. It makes me very sad that my wide bum doesn't fit into any of my design clothes anymore. At my heaviest I was 223, at my lightest 134. Currently, I weight 186 and wear a size 16. I'm ready for a change.
Some goals I've got in mind:
Get back into my size 28 jeans
Wear a two piece swim suit
Find an exercise activity I enjoy
I would really appreciate anyone who is willing to share their experiences and advice. It's a scary decision and I feel like I'm completely alone in the journey since everyone has been so negative. Finding this blog community was a real saving grace and I have been reading about everyone's experiences with great interest.
I guess that's all from me for now... I'm going to try and post here every week. Have a great week everyone!
So, I a bit about me. I'm 23 years old and I live in central Alberta. I recently built a house and moved in with my boyfriend of two years, who will henceforth be called TFG (that friggin guy). I work in oil and gas and spend most of my time out in the field surrounded by nature. It's a great job that keeps me out of the office and gets me home every night.
I am a fashion junkie. I love to shop and I love designer clothes. It makes me very sad that my wide bum doesn't fit into any of my design clothes anymore. At my heaviest I was 223, at my lightest 134. Currently, I weight 186 and wear a size 16. I'm ready for a change.
Some goals I've got in mind:
Get back into my size 28 jeans
Wear a two piece swim suit
Find an exercise activity I enjoy
I would really appreciate anyone who is willing to share their experiences and advice. It's a scary decision and I feel like I'm completely alone in the journey since everyone has been so negative. Finding this blog community was a real saving grace and I have been reading about everyone's experiences with great interest.
I guess that's all from me for now... I'm going to try and post here every week. Have a great week everyone!
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